Wednesday, January 22, 2014

How The Russian Beat The Germans at Leningrad

You can't make this stuff up. Real life....

Ever had a day?

Where your wife's cranky first thing in the AM for some reason. Don't have a clue

Haven't been able to drive to your own house since Friday

Wife decides she wants to go grocery shopping rather than making do

Then the feud erupts as to how do they get the groceries to the top of the hill.  

Her way..... Old school Russian. Put your crap on a kart and tote it up the hill through the snow

His way....... Go get the yard tractor with the little trailer and simply drive that to tote the groceries

She gets the cart ready to do it her way at the bottom of the drive

He's pissed she's not listening to his logical simple way to do it

She unloads the cart and proceeds to put the groceries on the cart

He walks off telling her he's going to get the tractor. He has to walk to the house to get the key to the gate. At least 3/8 of a mile and it's cold

She starts dragging the groceries up the icy snow covered drive, cussing him the whole way

He gets to the gate and gets the mower out just as she is at the gate to the shop about 3/8 mile from the house

She argues let's just pull it and we will be done

He says nonsense why tote these like that. Loads groceries in kart

She's pissed

He try's to drive tractor. Tractor don't go

He try's different things he thinks will get him moving. They don't work. Now the tractors out of gas. He has to now walk another 3/8th of a mile to get gas

She takes the groceries out on the cart and continues to the house

He's stuck with the tractor out of gas, stuck. Has to push tractor off drive that others use that's covered in ice and snow. He's pissed

She's in the warm house putting the groceries away. Warm. 

He has to now walk 3/8 of a mile freezing his ass off. Toting a 5 gal full jug of gas. It's 3/8 of a mile, one way up hill on a drive slipperier than snot on a glass door knob. 

She rubs it in her way was better

He's pissed goes to hot tub. Comes back and the laugh together about the whole thing

Moral of the story

That's why why the Nazi got their asses kicked at Leningrad. Simplicity, determination and belief  

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